Fear, focus, and the future. Here, C.M. Humphries writes about whatever.
Before you read this there's a good chance you checked your Facebook. If you scrolled around your news feed, you might've also scoffed at all the wishy-washy relationship nonsense. Let's not kid ourselves. Sometimes you wonder if anyone has a working relationship. But here's the thing: I stumbled across the answer and I'm going to provide the first step towards a working relationship for free. Now, this post has little to do with eReaders (as the title might've implied) and more to do with books, both digital and print. Ladies and gentlemen, future avid No-Injury Policy readers, prepare yourselves for bibliotherapy.
Break a spine, not a heart.
Whenever a relationship starts to dwindle, a few unfortunate events are likely to take place. The best of the worst scenarios involves a simple break-up. The worst of the worst involves cheating, manipulation, abuse, etc. So how to we try to keep our relationships going, especially marriage?
Obviously, the first method is talking it out. This rarely goes as well as planned unless the relationship consists of two down-to-Earth individuals. Another procedure might be marriage counselling. How about self-help books? They're everywhere, right?
However, according to positive results in England, the answer is fiction. The procedure is known as bibliotherapy.
The first thing you would need to do is sign up here. Now, of course, all therapy costs money. If there's some kind of psychological or sociological dilemma, people are always there to help you . . . for a price.
All dark humor aside, you sign up and meet a group of three therapists during a session. You tell them absolutely everything. You say what's wrong with the relationship and so does your significant other. Easy enough so far, right?
Here's the tough part, but it's shown results. During bibliotherapy, both you and your significant other are assigned a list of literature to read. There's a heavy focus on fiction, but there's also poetry, philosophy, and so on. The idea is that these books are carefully selected because they portray the very issues you're having in your relationship, and they offer provide clever simulations in the same manner almost all fiction depicts human interaction. You'll be able to see how certain things affect your loved one, and vice versa.
You've gotta stick with it
In many westernized nations, "culture" (meaning the arts) is turning into an occasional experience. You might read book on the weekend or visit a museum.
It's strange how we only embrace the arts when "we have time for it", when really the entire concept of culture is to provide examples by which we can better understand how to pursue certain things in our lives and how we can cope with so many different social circumstances. Art's the manual for life, but how many of us actual read manuals?
I'll admit that I spend more time on the Internet than on the pages of books, and the result it negative. Social media outlets, although I love their ideal usage, really just bring us down. A lot of information on the Internet is either junk or factual. More often than not, we like the trash rather than the useful information. Don't believe me? Check out this post on CNN providing games on their newsite.
So the deal is, when you explore bibliotherapy and receive your list of books, you have to read them. We're talking about people with PhDs spending countless hours coming up with just the right set of books that are most crucial in this moment of your life. We're talking about cracking open a spine to a book that will distance yourself from your current thinking and open your mind. It'll be that song you can relate to when you're down.
Now I cannot say this therapy will save all relationships. What I can say, though, is I've been working on it since before it had a name. Whenever I need a fresh look on life, I try to pick out the book that jumps off the shelf during certain moments. I get lost in books, and when I return, I feel a lot better. Books are therapeutic. And that's my next point, this form of therapy isn't just for couples.
It's not only for couples.
If you're personally feeling depressed, anxious, lonely, curious, etc., the same set of bibliotherapists will prescribe books specifically to your case. These are people who will listen and who will set you up with exactly the story you need to read at a certain moment in your life.
In a world of Amazon and Barnes & Noble, it's interesting to see how neglected significant literature is. I'm not removing the wool from anyone's eyes when I say the books in these stores are almost strictly mainstream and super-duper corporate - the kind of books for which the author's name is more important than the title or story itself.
But go into a B&N and tell them how you're feeling and ask them to prescribe the perfect book. They'll probably snicker and rush to pick out a book with similar themes, but they won't let you spend hours upon hours in the store trying to match a book to your emotions. Plus, ever pay attention to the other art forms you consume when you're down? Angry people like angry music. A broken heart likes a sad song. Over-analytical types enjoy art they can't fully figure out.You need someone else with a lot of literary experience to prescribe a book for you.
So here's my thought on all this: If you really want to keep a relationship going, slap money together for vacation in the United Kingdom, and drop by Britain for your first bibliotherapy session. You'll have a list of great books to help your relationship out - that is if you're truly dedicated - and you'll be on a spontaneous trip in another country. Unless of course you're already British.
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Fear, focus, and the future. C.M. Humphries talks about writing, horror, and whatever.